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Sandwich Monday: PB&J Balls

More convenient than a PB&J, unless you're eating them on an incline.
NPR
More convenient than a PB&J, unless you're eating them on an incline.

Certain foods are supposed to be spheres: Cocoa Puffs; gum balls; eggs (if your chicken is broken). The folks at Welch's have spherified the peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and if they're allowed to do that, we're allowed to make up the word spherified.

Ian: It looks like they came out of a PB&Rabbit.

Miles: Finally, a way for me to shove an entire sandwich in my mouth without attracting unwanted attention.

Actually, reading the ingredients, it's not a PB& J, it's an FC, WG, PASP, S, CS, MCS, CA, SC, SF, C6H8O6, P, AT, A, VAP, S, PK, PO, PF, NM, WP, PB, S, SL, CO, CW & CG.
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NPR
Actually, reading the ingredients, it's not a PB& J, it's an FC, WG, PASP, S, CS, MCS, CA, SC, SF, C6H8O6, P, AT, A, VAP, S, PK, PO, PF, NM, WP, PB, S, SL, CO, CW & CG.

Robert: I'm all for chefs deconstructing familiar foods to make something all new, but my daughter wadded up her PB&J into little pellets just like this when she was 3.

Ian: They look like a health-food version of whatever the Hungry Hungry Hippos were eating.

Miles: I like these better than the Tuna Salad Spheres you brought in last week.

Miles considers developing a peanut allergy until this lunch is over.
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NPR
Miles considers developing a peanut allergy until this lunch is over.

Ann: My next Valentine's card: We go together like peanut butter and jelly bite-size balls.

Ian: Mmmm, just like Mom used to process.

Miles: Kids who have this packed in their lunch also get a note that says, "I'm just not that into you. Sincerely, Mom."

Robert took the elementary school lunch thing all the way. Maybe this time he'll graduate!
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NPR
Robert took the elementary school lunch thing all the way. Maybe this time he'll graduate!

[The verdict: Four-fifths of us hated them; one-fifth of us is me.]

Sandwich Monday is a satirical feature from the humorists at Wait Wait ... Don't Tell Me!

Copyright 2020 NPR. To see more, visit https://www.npr.org.

Ian Chillag