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Sandwich Monday: Taco Bell Dessert Nachos

The ice cream comes from the same freezer where they store the cryogenically frozen chihuahua.
NPR
The ice cream comes from the same freezer where they store the cryogenically frozen chihuahua.

Depending on where you are in the world, Taco Bell can be as many as 2 miles away. Fortunately the chain has started selling make-at-home kits, and today we're trying the Dessert Nacho Kit. It's a great chance to make your own cuisine, and you can keep the box around to help you stop spelling "dessert" like "desert" all the time.

Miles: It's a little disconcerting that the box has two expiration dates, one for the product, and one for the person eating it.

Ian: Yeah, a dessert kit is fun and all, but I'm one unit of motivation away from just eating each of the separate parts straight out of the box.

Eva: This is much better than the model airplane kit I tried to eat last Monday.

If Robert looks afraid, it's because he fears that no moment for the rest of his life will equal this one.
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NPR
If Robert looks afraid, it's because he fears that no moment for the rest of his life will equal this one.

Ian: I got an ice cream headache. Usually when I eat Taco Bell this fast, all I get is the respect of my peers.

Eva: Why is there an Allen wrench in my nachos?

Mike: All that's missing is some Magic Shell salsa.

Robert: It's tasty. But until it comes with fluorescent yellow ice cream that glorps out of a pump, it won't be a complete nacho experience.

Death, from above
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NPR
Death, from above

Kelsie: With winter approaching, make sure you have plenty of emergency dessert nacho kits in your car.

Eva: How is this a kit? Nachos are a food you make because you don't want to actually assemble anything.

Ann uses the Two-Handed Neuhaus Grip.
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NPR
Ann uses the Two-Handed Neuhaus Grip.

Robert: Oh, the box says it contains 5 servings. Sorry guys, I'll go get some more for you.

Ian: A good name if they do an ice cream burrito would be a brrrrrrito.

Ann: Nachos and ice cream. Now I can watch football and cry about my ex-boyfriend at the same time.

[The verdict: really quite delicious. The perfect thing after a meal from Taco Bell, and before a meal from Taco Bell, and between all meals from everywhere.]

Sandwich Monday is a satirical feature from the humorists at Wait, Wait ... Don't Tell Me!

Copyright 2020 NPR. To see more, visit https://www.npr.org.

Ian Chillag