In The NoCo

Want to help your kids be successful and resilient? A Fort Collins educator wrote a new handbook

By In The NoCo,

Published January 28, 2025 at 5:35 AM MST

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Deborah Winking, a woman with medium-length light brown hair and wearing a dark blue-green sweater, smiles for a photo. She is the author of the new book "Raising Capable Kids" - which was written to help parents encourage independence and resilience in their neurodivergent children. — "We know that every organism in this world grows through some amount of discomfort; in fact, we realize that neuroscience tells us that these cow paths in our brain turn into superhighways when we experience and adapt to little bits of adversity," says Fort Collins author and educator Deborah Winking. "We have parents who feel like, 'Oh, we've got to make our child safer and more comfortable,' when in fact, what we really need is to offer them some challenge."

Parents worry about getting parenting right: limiting screen time, teaching responsibility, helping with homework. It’s a lot of pressure.

Author Deborah Winking is an elementary school educator in Fort Collins. And she found her fears about raising a well-rounded child magnified after one of her children, Jack, was diagnosed with Sotos syndrome, a rare neurological disorder. Doctors weren’t optimistic that Jack would be able to live a full life.

But Deborah figured out how to support her son through childhood and school. Along the way she developed some guidelines for what it means to be a supportive parent.

Her newest book, Raising Capable Kids, distills years of her research and experience into a set of 12 habits for parents. She wrote it with families of neurodivergent kids in mind, but says she hopes her book is useful to any parent or teacher who wants their kids to grow into strong, curious and independent human beings.

Deborah spoke with host Erin O’Toole about some of the advice she offers to parents.

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In The NoCo

KUNC's In The NoCo is a daily slice of stories, news, people and issues. It's a window to the communities along the Colorado Rocky Mountains. The show brings context and insight to the stories of the day, often elevating unheard voices in the process. And because life in Northern Colorado is a balance of work and play, we celebrate the lighter side of things here, too.

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Erin O'Toole

As the host of KUNC’s new program and podcast In the NoCo, I work closely with our producers and reporters to bring context and diverse perspectives to the important issues of the day. Northern Colorado is such a diverse and growing region, brimming with history, culture, music, education, civic engagement, and amazing outdoor recreation. I love finding the stories and voices that reflect what makes NoCo such an extraordinary place to live.

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Ariel Lavery

Ariel Lavery grew up in Louisville, Colorado and has returned to the Front Range after spending over 25 years moving around the country. She co-created the podcast Middle of Everywhere for WKMS, Murray State University’s NPR member station, and won Public Media Journalism awards in every season she produced for Middle of Everywhere. Her most recent series project is "The Burn Scar", published with The Modern West podcast. In it, she chronicles two years of her family’s financial and emotional struggle following the loss of her childhood home in the Marshall Fire.

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Brad Turner

Brad Turner is an executive producer in KUNC's newsroom. He manages the podcast team that makes In The NoCo, which also airs weekdays in Morning Edition and All Things Considered. His work as a podcaster and journalist has appeared on NPR's Weekend Edition, NPR Music, the PBS Newshour, Colorado Public Radio, MTV Online, the Denver Post, Boulder's Daily Camera, and the Longmont Times-Call.

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