This isn't going to be sciencey. This is just total, happy craziness. Suppose you have never seen a baseball game. All you know is cricket, and somebody sticks you at a Yankee/Red Sox game and says, "Do the play by play. Now. You're on!" There's no time to prepare. You don't know the rules, the names or the positions. All you know are the rhythms of your beloved cricketeers, but these "NY" players, whatever they're doing, it's not quite cricket. So you try to describe what's going on. What might that sound like?
Well, in the nuttiest of all possible worlds, it might sound like this.
I especially loved, "caught by the chap in the pajamas with the glove that makes everything easier."
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