Baseball is a weird game. That is to say: It is a very human game.
All those wide-open grasslands patrolled by gloved shepherds, and brutes carrying clubs. Their mission: To chase a bouncing ball that has a mind of its own. Stranger yet: the action is initiated by baseball pitchers, who are haunted by visions of failure.
That’s especially true at Coors Field, a launch pad that sees more action than Cape Canaveral. According to an ESPN article called “Coors Field horror stories: 30 years of baseball at altitude,” teams average 5+ runs per game in Coors Field, the highest scoring rate in all of baseball.
Over Father’s Day weekend in 2019, the Rockies and Padres combined to score 92 runs. Put your bat on the ball, and it rises like a bubble in a Coors Light. Pop!
Case in point: A 25-1 loss the Rockies took in 2023. It was an historic event—the most thorough massacre in 148 years of professional baseball.
Never were the Rockies team colors more appropriate: Black and purple are the colors of a bruise.
I don’t mean to dwell on the sorry past. With any luck the Rockies will put their three recent 100-loss seasons behind them. To do that, they brought in an infusion of cash and management savvy by selling 40% of the team to the Broncos. Quarterback Bo Nix flings projectiles across town at Empower Field.
Perhaps he could pitch at Coors Field in the off-season?
The big development in baseball this year is the “automated ball-strike system,” empowering players to pat their helmets twice, and ask a computer if the ump was right. The Rockies’ catcher Hunter Goodman noted that pitchers can be too “emotional” to challenge a pitch, so he handles queries behind the plate.
So far the Rockies rank 27th out of 30 teams in pitch challenges. But that’s a better record than umpire C.B Bucknor. On March 12 he had three calls overturned in just the first inning, and six for the game.
It’s good he’s not a heart surgeon.
I’m a fan of getting things right, in surgery and strike calls. And clearly the Robo Umps are needed. But there’s a downside, too.
Baseball dugouts are eerily quiet these days. There’s no need to yell at the umpire when you can simply tap your helmet and a computer-generated animation will reveal the truth. But there was nothing more animated than watching Orioles manager Earl Weaver kick dirt on the ump’s shoes, while spewing spittle and Not Safe for Work language.
I mean, how do you yell at a Robo Umpire? In Fortran language?
Even though the Rockies aren’t succeeding much with their pitch challenges, they are flirting with mediocrity on the field. And there’s nothing more human than mediocrity. Or for that matter: Hope.
In springtime, we can all bask in the green glow of new growth, and possibilities.
