The new year is here and many people like to start with a clean slate and goals in mind to improve their physical and mental well-being. For many, that’s working on friendships.
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An important part of anyone's complete well-being is having strong positive friendships. That’s true according to multiple medical organizations like the American Psychological Association, which says, “Psychological research suggests that stable, healthy friendships are crucial for our well-being and longevity.”
Recently, In the NoCo spoke with Dr. Natalie Pennington, an assistant professor of communications studies at Colorado State University and the co-lead of the American Friendship Project. An organization that studies connections in the U.S.
Here are some tips from that episode to help you better cultivate your friendships and fight off loneliness.
- Connect over multiple forms of technology. Texting is a useful day-to-day way to chat and send memes with friends, but don’t miss other opportunities to connect. According to research from the American Friendship Project, other technologies like a phone call can provide a better connection.
- Use caution when over-relying on video chats. It’s great to see someone face-to-face on a screen. However, research has found that once the call ends, the high from seeing a friend can quickly dissipate, leaving some to feel lonely. It’s important to find daily connections with other people in the world to combat loneliness, even if that’s short conversations with a barista or other people out in the world.
- Don’t take connection for granted. People should be mindful when connecting. Try building a routine. Dr. Pennington says the more comfortable you get spending time with people the better.
- Don’t overthink it. Assume your friends like you. Unlike family or some romantic relationships, friendships can feel very voluntary, but don’t worry. Simple check-ins to say hi or bring someone a coffee can go a long way.
- Merge your New Year's resolutions. If one of your goals for 2025 is to work on your friendships and become smarter financially, take advantage of that. Spend time with friends who are good with money. The same goes for those looking to improve their physical health and have friends who enjoy going to the gym.
- Reconnect without overthinking it. If you haven’t spoken to someone in months or even years, you don’t need to lead with an apology. Be more casual. Don’t start a conversation addressing the long break from speaking. Instead, start the conversation with something simple like saying a funny video made you think of that person.
- “No relationship is effortless.” Some people believe a good friendship should not take a ton of work but Dr. Pennington says that’s not true. All relationships take work. Whether that’s family, romantic or a platonic friendship. That means no matter what, you need to make an effort.
- Don’t be afraid to schedule meet ups. Researchers suggest synching up scheduling and finding time to see friends. People should avoid hoping it happens organically. It may feel weird to share calendars at first, but finding an actual date and time can help build a relationship.
Check out the full conversation from In the NoCo here.
